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Reaching For Clear Skies.

Monday, December 23, 2013

My Room Is Different + We Argue More Often

"I don't want a lot for Chrismas
There is just one thing I need
I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree.

I just want you for my own
More than you can ever know
Make my wish come true
Oh, All I want for Christmas is you."

I guess today I decided to do two blogs in one since I gotten kinda lazy and I'm a TAD bit sleepy.

My room has had quite a dramatic change. After living like a bum for a period of time, I got my ass up and cleaned the SHIT out of it =). With Denne around, I took the chance to move my furniture around to what I've been having in mind for a good few months now. Denne seemed to be pretty content with the change since he can enjoy some anime action in a super comfortable way now LOL. Well, at least that is what I interpreted his expressions to be. First photo is the view from my bed. As you can see, my desk is now fully set up right next to my bed lol. Second photo is the view from my door. Don't mind the quality though .-.



There is a few things I'd like the mention, however they are too short to fit into a paragraph. Hence, I'll just note them in dot points! xD :
  • Denne and I have been spending more time together nowadays. Its good that despite this fact, he is still spending time with his friends. All in all, Kitty is happy.
  • Due to the budget I am running on in order to make money to spend in Vietnam, I couldn't collect enough  money to make Denne one of  those female anime santa outfits, so I got him a handful of costumes. They arrived HEAPS earlier than I had thought it would and Denne seemed  more than pleased with that. If you know what I mean.
  • Denne asked me to give him a hair cut after I fixed his hair from the last time he had it cut. Honestly.. the faggot didn't really ask, he pestered and bribed me into doing it. I eventually gave in and did it... Once he makes up his  mind, there's nothing that will stop him I guess. Well, it took a while. Heaps of hair... HEAPS... EVERYTWHERE. In the end, he said it was good. I don't know if he actually means it if he is trying to be nice, but oh well. I guess I gotta believe his ass =)
  • Denne is off work now for the holidays. We found out that he was going to get a $200 gift for christmas. Pretty fucking dope boss if you ask me.
  • Denne snores loud ,-.
  • You also dribble a lot LOL!

Denne and I have been arguing more than we used to. He is starting to show his less attentive, dopey, spacey  and joking side whilst I start to show more of my broken, mentally unstable and  hot tempered side. Those things don't really mix well, as you can tell. Although these traits are a horrible combo, I can honestly say we are arguing less than I anticipated  I wouldn't even call them fights as I usually would. I get mad at him, we says sorry when he knows that he has fault, then I apologies when I calm down a few minutes later. We talk about it, sort things out, make adjustments and hear each others' opinions and thoughts on the topic. We hear each other out without in order to get each understand from both POVs, and compromise so that we can maybe handle it better next time. A number of the fights few as though it is just a learning process in which we learn about our significant other on an even deeper level than before. 

Though I say this, we often argue about money. We spend pretty much every single day together, that, and we are also tight on money since the Vietnam trip does not come cheap, so I can understand where it is coming from. Denne tends to spend very impulsively, so things come up here and there. Plus, its Christmas and New Year soon, so you can see why things tend to come up. 

I've been pretty distressed lately with the number of arguments and disagreements we have been having lately. Though it is nowhere near as much as what I have experienced, It still terrifies me. Although what happens after the argument and how the issue is solved is COMPLETELY  DIFFERENT, I still can not help but be scared. I guess I'm just scared of the same things happening again, scared of being broken even more. Being distressed about it doesn't really help the situation since it puts me even more on the edge, making me easier to blow off. I'm grateful though, it seems as though Denne might have picked up on my distress as he has been slightly more gentle to me. Its crazy that he can make me feel so at ease, so fast after I snap at him. Its amazing how understanding he can be. 

No matter how many times I fall apart, no matter what the reason, he comes and picks me up. He picks up the pieces and fit them back together before he begins to solve the problem. 

"Didn't I tell you from the beginning? No matter how many times you fall apart, I'll be there to help you pick up the pieces one by one."

I guess someone as fucked over and fucked up as me needs someone as kind as him. Although he is a complete derp face, he is MY derpface ^~^ Something that I treasure more than anything.  Honestly, within the mist I've been in since I started dating Denne (mainly school, fake friends and familly complications here and there), I've never been happier. Welp, back to working hard and earning more money so that we can have a MOTHER FUCKING MAGICAL VACATION!!! YOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSHHH!!!!


がんばって~!!
Ganbatte~!! 

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